Evan aims to keep his personal and professional lives separate. He was essentially ordered to do so in the series premiere. His relationship with Malcolm caused problems when they were both teachers. They now have the freedom to be whatever they want to be as Malcolm left the school. However, Evan still feels immense pressure to conform in certain ways. He doesn't want to take things so seriously. And yet, he always escalates them to that place. When a student confides in him about being gay and struggling to come out, he has no compassion. He simply blurts out that he can't relate to the situation. He accepted this job in the Austin suburbs under the ideal of making a difference. His visibility as an out gay man in this environment is meaningful. This student obviously saw that importance. Evan directed him elsewhere. This wasn't a discussion he wanted to be part of. He had his own struggle growing up in the '90s. Things are different now. That's the easy explanation. He deflects because it's simple. It doesn't require any true insight. That's an empty way to live though. Instead, Evan has to make decisions about what he cares about. Nothing bad will happen. In fact, he will be surrounded by friends who champion him regardless.
Sure, it's incredibly awkward when Evan's co-workers surprise him at a gay bar for his birthday. It's an environment they don't naturally feel comfortable in. Evan isn't comfortable seeing them there either. It's strange. He's always on alert for people from the school who could see him. He monitors his own behavior out of fear his actions could reflect poorly on the school. He endures that pressure. He sabotages himself in a lot of ways. That has resulted in several toxic personality traits. Malcolm and Harry have reasons why they shouldn't be in a relationship with Evan. They maintain their attractions to him. Things don't have to end or be awkward simply because of some weirdness in the past. They are emotionally intelligent and open in that way. That's an honest reflection of gay relationships in the modern age. The narrative also tries to buck conventions by stating Malcolm was the man Evan was always in love with. However, that felt less shocking simply because he was more involved in Evan's life recently than Harry was. Evan and Harry still hadn't talked after their awkward kiss at the homecoming dance.
Nothing in Evan's life is particularly shocking. These characters know him. They embrace him for who he is. He has to accept that too. He hasn't for a long time. Grant even tells him this gathering technically counts as a school function. That immediately means Evan has to police his behavior. He has to act respectfully. He has to follow certain rules. Others direct him towards Harry. That situation is complicated by the rules. It's also complicated by Harry being in an open relationship. That isn't really addressed. He's simply presented as an option. He's someone Evan could have a meaningful relationship with that is equal to his potential with Malcolm. That works in some regards because Evan and Malcolm have an understanding of not being sexually exclusive. That's not what they want. They are fine with that. It's always been part of their connection. They don't need to hide that aspect of their lives or act as if it isn't there. Gwen was surprised by the realization that Nick was focused on the pool in the backyard to avoid looking for a job. She was the only one who didn't know that. She wants in on the theme of surprising revelations. Meanwhile, it truly is shocking when Markie confides in Evan about his crush on Gwen. These pieces fit together in a way that reinforces the strength of these bonds.
In fact, the characters only have the strength to do scary and vulnerable things because of each other. That lesson has been showcased in a number of stories throughout the season. Despite their frustrations, these characters like each other. They want things to work out. They are enraged by the system at times. They don't always understand the world around them. They say the wrong things. It's still funny. The show has its charms. It's told with a light touch about the pressures all of the characters face. It's more acute with Evan as the protagonist. Everyone else has a unique perspective that allows them to provide something of note to Evan on his journey. They all have value and meaning. Evan reciprocates that as well. He comforts Markie after Gwen and Nick share they've gotten back together. That relationship may not work. Gwen doesn't know how Markie feels. He was pumped up all night because he garnered so much attention at the bar. He liked that. Yet the one person he wanted to notice him was distracted. She was insecure about her own issues. It required a tough conversation. That occurred. The dysfunction is still present. The yard remains a mess. It still provides refuge for this gang after a wild night out together. That's enjoyable. It offers no need to behave a certain way. It's simply about acceptance despite the differences they have elsewhere. That's a powerful message. At times, it can be a bit too broad. Here though, the sweetness of the charm is very enjoyable.
